Jan 31, 2014

at 1:48 AM

New.

Happy Chinese New Year. :3 


My face may look flawless in this photo.
But truth is it's 10 times worse than you think.
D:



Washed all my darlings this afternoon, now they're all clean on bed!


New year, new face.


New meow shirt too!

1.47am. Goodnight Joey!



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Jan 30, 2014

at 12:16 PM

Clean-up!

Whee CNY is here! $_$

Joking.

I guess I really have to start cleaning my room already. Had too much time lazing around till I forgot today is new year eve! Room's in deep mess, so is myself.

2 days ago went Times Square with sister. Shopped like mad and spent an amount of money that could feed me for 3 months! (if only you know how much I actually spend in a month) It was more like a half day trip thou, met with some high school friends and decided to join them for the rest of the day. Was good being able to hang out with these people again. =)


Jiejie =)




BBQ Plaza with high school babes.



Yesterday afternoon went saloon for my new haircut rawr. Mom has been urging me to go for hair treatment and stuff, strange mother. After that I had a mini meet up session with a PLKN friend, buff guy, suddenly jio me yamcha, bu cuo bu cuo. Later in the evening I went out again with family. Chilled with bro and sister at Tesco McD while mom and aunt went in to shop. Had a good bonding time, I always love hanging out and fooling around with my siblings. =)


Isshhh so when do I do my laundry and tidy room?

Apart from that also my desktop is like a rubbish dump. I think tio virus liao, so downloaded trial version of Kaspersky, gotta do a deep clean-up! But where do I find time again? rawrr!!!


 My break this round is a sufficient break. I sleep at 12am and wake up at 11am everyday. Almost. Gonna have a mask session with sister and mom tonight after reunion dinner, while playing card games with dad and bro, just like how we always do on cny eve.

Till then Joey Tien is off to clean room. CIAO! ^__^

God is at work.
That much I'm sure.



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Jan 27, 2014

at 3:33 PM

A breakaway.

Right now at this point of life, I would say it's a turning point. 27th of January? What did I do since 2014 came? Trust me very soon it will be 2015. But before everything flies, I want to just grab hold of this moment and perhaps with a mental stop motion button for me to press.

There goes my first semester of Foundation. I could still remember the first few weeks in class where I was still so excited about uni life. Well of course I still am enjoying the things I do. 3 days ago was my last day of class, I submitted 2 assignments on the same day, and I was physically and mentally worn out. I'm not gonna write every detail here as there were really too much to talk about. Thanks to those who has constantly asked about my condition, thanks to those who helped. Thanks. The moment I submitted the last assignment it was really a relief to me.. I couldn't stop seeing God's grace and how He was with me throughout the hassle. I won't say my work is good, but I know I'm definitely gonna improve, because I told God I'm doing everything for Him, no other reason. =)

First of all my English Play was perfect, I think. We practiced till 3am just the day before presentation. Lecturer liked our story, thanks to the guys in our group, they wrote the script :D Lecturer commended me for my acting, which was rare because I hardly get that. Or maybe because I don't always get to act. :x Well she promised she'll give our group above 20 out of 25. Our hard work paid off, my group was awesome.


From the left
Kavi :: Sashsi :: Thevan :: me :: Gracia :: Fara


before presentation, they insisted to put on make-up.
D:

below are pictures during practices.




Secondly it was my Computer Graphics poster. I thought I was good with it but turned out it was pretty bad. I showed my senior my poster he terus said 'memang x boleh pakai' ouchh much. Haha. But I was cool with it because I know I did not put in enough effort. I kinda neglected the poster and only did it in one night. Gotta buck up Joey!


Then it was my Photography. My first submission got rejected because of the lighting and shits. This lecturer is the strictest one among all, 80% of my classmates' work also got rejected. At least I wasn't alone D: So I went back and adjusted the lighting, then sent for printing again. Second time of printing was at a different shop, way cheaper, but the quality sucks. So it made no difference, my second submission imo was worse. But care no more, I submitted anyway. I don't expect high marks for photography. =(




Thanks to model Evan for bearing with my unprofessional skills. Thanks for walking with me to everywhere for good spots. In the end we still completed the task, can't thank you more, my last minute help! =)



One of my favorite shot.

Next it's le Life Drawing. Nothing much about it, just that it was my first time drawing and colouring on a sugar paper with oil pastel. Many has given me positive comments, but I still think I could do better, if I had better skills. 



before and after.

below are some of my homework I did when I was half asleep.


For my 5th assignment, it was le Creative Studies. I don't have pictures to show, but this subject is also one of the not-so-important subject to me. Except for one night where I was up till morning to do an essay of 1.5k words. Seriously that could possibly be the longest essay I've done. Long more way to go? I know. Well this was a group assignment, so to cut the long story short I only did the essay. The final video clip was done by my leader, it wasn't very good because we didn't have enough time, but I still appreciate each one of them.

Lastly it was the most time-killing subject ever. Everybody is afraid of it, the one and only Visual Research & Communication in other words VRC. The final project was done on an A1 canvas. Something new to me yet challenging at the same time. Thanks to my procrastination, I had to stay up almost 2 nights in a row to rush this piece of work. I wasn't very satisfied but in the end lecturer kinda liked it, so it was a miracle.


There were dramas in between, there were hard times in between, there were times when I almost gave up my undone work. But I have gone through them with the strength from Above, I am grateful. Thank You Lord, thank You..



This was how my living room looked like after my last project was submitted.
Instead of tidying them right away I actually took time to capture this mess, because they remind me of all the sweat and weariness and stress and whatnot.

Then I snapped, and told myself,
it's just the beginning.


Other than the endless work, I had other activities in between too. First it was my trip with family to I-city. My first time there. Nothing special there, but it was the warmth of my family that made the trip a perfect one.








Next trip was to Tanjung Sepat together with family and sister's boyfie. I so wished baby was with me..to enjoy together. But, I could only imagine..


outfit of the day.

and some favorite shots below.


couple no.1


couple no.2


couple no.3! :D



selfie.


so much loves..
and then i imagined 'him' with me, holding my hand, walking across the sand, just that..


crabbie!

And some other random happenings.


High school friend's 21st birthday.
I bet there'll be more parties soon, since it's my batch to be 21 this year.

 Speaking of that, boyfriend just turned 21 bout 3 weeks ago. I did not have much time to prepare a lot, what I did was this.


And I surprised him through webcam.
Written on the chipsmore was 'Happy 21st Birthday Baby' with little starts that people use to decorate cupcakes or cakes.

I don't know how much he appreciated it, but I really hope he would remember this.. Then one week later was our 4th anniversary. I had no time even for the cookies above, let alone doing better things for him. It was such a waste because that period of time was my busiest period, with all the submissions and stuff. Sorry love..

Just as my title says, right now to me, it's a breakaway, from everything.
I'm taking a break from uni, taking a break from the crowd, taking a break from my complicated relationship, a break just for myself to rest emotionally mentally and physically. I need to regain my strength, I need alone time to clear my mind and just be away a little while from reality. I need to take this time to be closer to God, to hear from Him, to let Him take charge of the rest of my life.

I'm 21 soon, I want to be ready to step into adulthood.
I can't stay young forever.
It's time to take up the responsibility, and look ahead into the future.  



There are so many questions running in my head.
And only God, knows the reason behind them.

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Jan 6, 2014

at 1:58 PM

On my own.

It was supposed to be a very good day despite it being a Monday, cause I only have one class and I have the whole day to myself. But things seem to go against me so much that I can't find what is there to be happy about today.

Final is close and it's almost the end of my first semester for Foundation year. All the projects have been given and I have a total of 6 final assignments to hand in by next week. The stress is kicking in and plus this stupid period I'm having, it gets me so restless and so packed in my little useless brain.

Out of the 6 assignments, 2 of them are group assignments. I have 2 different groups to work with. One was the efficient one the other I'm not sure but they seem so passive and I'm kinda worried. The first group I'm with now has 6 members including me. The 5 of them are in one group for another assignment.. I didn't get to be in the group because I wasn't in class that day. So just now when we were talking about the first assignment, they were discussing also for the second assignment. I was there, quiet the whole time. I can't say anything because I'm not in their group for the second assignment.. I suddenly felt so..left out. Even for the first assignment, they seem to know everything but me.. I don't understand why.. Suddenly somebody said 'It's okay Joey, we all know you work best alone..' I mean, she really meant what she said and she understood my style of doing things. And she was also right that I prefer to work alone. But the moment she said that my heart really sank..perhaps I just felt really alone that time..I can't feel the togetherness with them..sigh

Then I said I should leave, because there isn't much things for me to know already..so I left, depressed. I walked to the ATM machine cause I need to settle some payment. Then I saw another group of my classmates that I was quite close with. They were walking together laughing and just seem so, happy. Without me..

They said hi and just went off to another direction..I was left alone to do my own stuff again.

I sometimes really wonder how it feels like to have a really strong friendship with a group of same friends all the time. I see a lot of my friends who're always with the same people. It's hardly that way for me, since secondary school, form 6, and even now.

I'm always afraid to bring trouble to people, therefore I hardly ask for help. It always seems to me like when I ask for help the person's gonna feel irritated, so I avoid that. I like to take my own time doing my things, I don't like to make people wait. So whenever class ended or anything, I'm usually alone. I walk out of the class alone, I walk home alone, and I just enjoy doing that.

That's pretty much how I live everyday.

When I first entered uni I had this group of friends that I mentioned in my earlier posts. They were crazy, awesome, high, excited all the time. They have so many activities together and they're always outside hanging out. I used to be one of them, but because I rejected them too many times for outing, they started to leave me out of the picture. I don't get invitation anymore, I don't get to take selfies with them anymore. Out of 10 selfies of them I'm in none. They used to invite me for meals, but because I cook my own meals, they stopped inviting me. They used to invite me to their place to have fun together, but because I like to stay home, they stopped inviting me..

All of these contributes and I'm now finally being left alone. They gave me all my space, they gave me all the time I want to myself, they stopped calling me to join them..

What hurts the most was when even a 'goodbye' was never said to me. Just now while we were having group discussion, when the rest of them were leaving the class, the girl turned and was like 'hey XXX and XXX, goodbyeeeeeee~' I was right in the middle of them, how could she not see me..but I waved anyway.. Then after awhile another group passed by and was like 'hey, later on?' then one of my groupmate was like 'yeah sure, later okay? bye cya' I was like okay..you guys had plans? what could it be.. Of course I did not say it out, but I felt really down that moment.

Sigh.

It's not like I have problem being alone..
but why is everybody treating me like I don't exist?
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Jan 3, 2014

at 2:32 PM

Welcoming the year.

Hello 2014! =) 
I'm gonna be 21 this year. Man time flies.
No more a small girl, but still hoping to be some people's small girl forever. Bleh.

Countdown this round was different, cause boyfie wasn't around..because of the different time zone, Malaysia reached 2014 15hours earlier than US. I wanted to video cam with him and watch the fireworks together and all but dang my stupid retarded phone. Not gonna explain too much but I missed the chance. Also, I did not get to see any fireworks this year. Ha. Ha. What a countdown right.

But one thing that made it special was the group of people I was with. My CF friends at uni planned the countdown  at Putrajaya near a lake, the view was magnificent, the streetlights were so romantic, the atmosphere was perfect. If only he was there with me.. =)

Like I always say my CF bunch is an awesome bunch. We played some games just for fellowship purposes. Doesn't matter what game we played actually, with them any lame game would become interesting. x) Also Mr. WingYuen was there with the group of people. Thank you for coming all the way to join me.. ^^

Even thou the time was short and even thou I was emo the whole time with my retarded phone, the outing that night was definitely special.


About 15 of us.
=)

So right now I'm actually at Old Times Kopitiam, Serdang alone blogging. Waiting for dad to come and pick me. Had myself a fine Ice Blended Carrot Juice and just chilling here since they have Wifi and air-cond.


Ta-daa.

But also at the same time my stomach is sending me an SOS message asking for help. I think Imma drop by at a mamak for some food before dad reaches. Food here is too expensive and my purse has less than 15 bucks now. 


Selfie



eeeeyer light kacau.

Rawr. 
How's the year gonna be? 
I can't wait to explore. 

=)
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